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Etiquette of the Table
Let's not call it a “social contract,” let's just call it etiquette so everyone has fun.
Rules of the table
The top rule: don’t be a dick
If you sum everything up to this top rule, we'll likely get along fine. We're getting together to play a game together and enjoy one another's company, this shouldn't be hard.
If you have to get a lot of clarification on what is involved in being a dick, or want to split hairs on what might be dickish, you just might want to look within on this one because I suspect you truly have the answers to this if you dig deeply enough. Coming at this in bad faith is a dick move, after all.
The keyword is “respect”
We're all adults so I don't feel like I should have to say this, but I'm going to put it out there regardless:
We're all here to have fun, but not at the expense of one another.
Again, this should be a given but I've been surprised at times that it's not. It's about respect:
- Respect the other players.
Everyone is here to have fun, just like you. Respect them, their belongings, decisions, culture, beliefs, etc.
- Respect people's desire to stay safe.
If you are playing in a face-to-face session we ask that all attending are vaccinated against COVID-19 and influenza. If you are unwilling to do so please stick to virtual sessions only.
Also, don't bring firearms, swords, knives or other weapons to games. This isn't a LARP, so those have no place at the table.
- Respect people new to the game.
You were new to the game once too, and needed time to learn. Respect players and let them make their own decisions in the game.
- Respect the home or place of business of the host.
Wherever we're playing, we've been allowed to gather there to play together. Respect that and their place, and leave it in at least the same condition you found it.
- Respect the game.
Don't just cause trouble, attack other characters or cause problems for the Hell of it. If it's not working out for you, that's fine, but don't make a nuisance of yourself just because you're not in the spotlight or things aren't happening the way you think they should. (See also.)
Phones are okay, but put them on vibrate
If you need to take a call or text a lot, please step away from the table. It's distracting to other players and if it becomes a problem you'll be asked to leave the table and/or game.
Note that during play your turn will not be held if you are away using your phone, you will just be assumed to be doing nothing other than passively following the rest of the party.
What happens in the real world stays in the real world
Only in-game politics and religion at the table, none from outside. We didn't come here for that.
Just... don’t
Rules lawyers suck, period, full stop
So do most of the gamer stereotypes, but rules laywers are by far the worst. Just… don't. (He who lives by the sword dies by it. Repeatedly.)
Being pointlessly edgy, running an antisocial character and playing “evil” characters in general
We're all here to have fun and play a game. For some it's not fun to have someone else in the party who is edgy or brooding just to be edgy or brooding, or going around stealing from party members, attacking them or causing trouble with NPCs. (I'll admit it's not fun for a lot of DMs, either.)
I know you're supposed to roleplay, but having to watch your back against the world and compatriots or suffer the consequences of someone who is random for no purpose but their own edification is just… exhausting. It's also not fun. At the table, let's agree that the party are all allies and we hunt the monsters, not be the monsters.
“But, it’s what my character would do!”
Think about it. Then think about it again. Then think some more. I can't really think of any situations where using that phrase to defend your character's actions is valid for a friendly game. If you still insist, then play another character. If you can't do that, reflect on reality.
Miscellaneous and sundry
A PSA for old-school gaming
Old-school gaming can be a bit brutal. For instance, if you can't handle that character fatalities can and do happen or feel like mapping isn't necessary to success then there may be a problem.
Also, old-school gaming often has no interest in your character backstory or concept other than how you play your character (“levels 1-3 are your character backstory”). Story is what you make, not something preordained for your character. There's a different style of play going on here.
Not all games are for everyone
When a new player joins a gaming group it's a bit like dating: sometimes the fit is right, sometimes it's not. Even though this is intended to be an open table game with a shifting cast of players who may be regulars, play occasionally or even only once, we all still need to get along. If you are not enjoying the game style, old-school rules or just another player, let's talk about it. I suspect we can come to some resolution or understanding that is acceptable.
However, the reality is that if we can't work it out maybe this just isn't the game or group for you. Trust me, no gaming is better than bad gaming, and life is too short to do something you don't enjoy. I want to game to have fun, and I want everyone at my table to have fun!
